Starting Somewhere (new)

Day 6

Already left Louisiana – Miss them tons

 

Ok, maybe I did cry, Jenny. You didn’t. Patricia didn’t. Olivia didn’t. Most of you didn’t. Ok.

 

Ok, I cried. Not everyone needs to know that, though. Not everyone needs to keep hearing that I cried while the rest didn’t. I mean, I don’t mind people knowing I felt sad, but I don’t want it to be a topic that keeps coming up like a piece of food stuck in between your teeth that you try picking out with your tongue.

 

Let’s just think about this. None of you cried because you were all going to see your hosts in maybe 12 weeks. I’m not, ok. That was the last time I will ever see Katherine. I know that’s not what I want it to be like, but most likely it’s true. I won’t see her because she won’t come to Panama in only 12 weeks. I won’t see her, unlike you guys.

 

So I cried. For a good reason. I’m going to miss her so much I can’t even explain with words. I showed her and everyone else how great of a time I had with her. How she was open-minded and caring at home. She helped me get the hang of things and taught me tons of which I’ll never forget. She stood by my side and supported me those tough days.

 

The day we had to leave was miserable. I cried and cried together with her. We hugged each other for a long time. We cried and took deep breaths, almost suffocating. We hugged tighter and tighter than ever before and we didn’t let go. We whispered a hard to understand dialog with a lot of sobbing and sniffing. We kept telling each other how much we were gonna miss each other. We kept whispering how we would never forget each other. We made sad little jokes, trying to cheer each other up, but failing and only coming to a point where we started to cry even more.

 

When we had to let go, I kept crying. She kept crying too. She ran after me and hugged me one last time before we really had to move on. Most of the bus ride I cried. Even when Jenny leaned on my shoulder to fall asleep. I just silently looked out the window and drained my tears out.

 

Ok, I cried, but so what? I meant it and I’m grateful I did.

 

Just typing this up has almost made me cry, but you know what, that’s a good thing.

 

It’s healthy.

 

So, I cried.

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